


the breaking fall

by TheOtherOdinson



Series: Lost Son [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Family Drama, Gen, Loki (Marvel) Has Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:21:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26431069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOtherOdinson/pseuds/TheOtherOdinson
Summary: Change is inevitable.
Series: Lost Son [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/453718
Comments: 30
Kudos: 133





	the breaking fall

_Gatekeeper, you were listening?_

_I was._

_Do you see him?_

_I do._

_Then it is time to send the Mad Titan Asgard's regards._

***

_Most noble liege, a gift for you._

_What use have I of a shivering, cringing gift?_

_I have looked into his mind, my lord. He is of Asgard. A son of Odin._

_Bring him closer._

***

The queen remained after her king and son departed. She offered food he did not want. Told stories he did not wish to hear. Fluttered nervously about him in a manner that left him strangely unsettled. All the while watching him with eyes shimmering with...something.

Loki wanted her to leave. But couldn't bring himself to say the words.

As night fell over this foreign land the queen still did not take her leave. She brewed tea that filled the air with achingly spicy sweetness. He took the cup she offered unthinkingly and was unsure which of them was more surprised. He held it under his nose to cover his odd reaction, letting the pungent aroma fill his nostrils. Tendrils of scent stretching up into his being.

_A cup of this very drink in hand. Seated across from this very queen. The two of them laughing together._

The cup fell from nerveless fingers. Hitting the stone floor and smashing into pieces, tea splattering him. Covering him in more of its deceit.

Loki fled the room.

***

_Thanos._

_Odin Allfather. Welcome to Sanctuary._

_You know why I have come._

_I can guess._

_You will die for what you have done to my son._

_I can't take all the credit. You broke him first. I merely reshaped what was left over._

***

_Who do you serve, child?_

_No...no one._

_What a waste._

***

A bath, scrubbed fresh. Clean clothes. But still the smell lingered in the air. Loki gathered an armful of clothes hanging in the wardrobe, burying his face in the cloth and inhaling deep.

_I swear, you have more clothes than Mother._

_Shut up, Thor._

Loki ripped off every stitch before setting the wardrobe ablaze.

He returned to the bath. There was the sound of people rushing into the suite, voices high in alarm. It occurred to him for a moment this would be a good time to try for another escape.

Loki closed his eyes and sank beneath the surface of the water.

***

_Sif, do you see my father?_

_A little busy at the moment._

_Fandral?_

_Also busy._

_Volst..._

_Less talking, Thor. More killing. And no. I haven't._

***

_Who do you serve._

_No one._

_Wrong answer._

***

"Where is your son?"

The queen stared at him, her lips parting in surprise. She recovered quickly. "Thor is abroad at the moment. He'll return soon."

"Not him. The other one you mentioned."

He surprised her again. Her eyes turned sad. "My youngest. He went away."

"Where?"

"I hope one day he will tell me when I hold him my arms again."

***

_You must seek death to come here, old fool._

_Death seeks us all._

_Bring her my greetings._

***

_What is your name._

_Loki._

_Who do you serve._

_No._

_I said - who do serve._

_Not you._

_Stupid boy._

***

New clothing filled the wardrobe. Fresh linens arrived each day. Food and drink was in abundance and brought by the queen. The healing woman came to see him often. The guards never touched him. Though he was not permitted out of these rooms, the space he was contained within was ridiculous in both size and luxury. He not denied while roaming about within them. If he wanted to eat, he could. If he wanted the bath, he could. Sleep, same. If he smashed every trinket collected on one of the book shelves, he could. And did. And was not reproached.

Though the queen's tears made him feel shamed.

If he rushed into another room and closed the door to escape her - he could do that too.

The shame remained.

***

_Are we winning?_

_I can't tell. Too many bodies in the way. Thor, what say you?_

_Thor?_

_Father!_

_Oh, fu -_

***

_Who do you serve?_

_I will never serve you._

_You do not take your lessons well._

_I am Loki, prince of Asgard. Odinson._

_Foolish, wilful child. Your future is written._

_No._

_Yes._

***

The queen let him out of the rooms.

Loki waited for the trap to be sprung.

But she simply smiled and invited him to walk with her.

He went.

Guards followed closely as they walked through golden corridors lined with statues.

He should run, he knew. It was his duty to his lord father to escape. He could strike out at one of the guards, as quick as his sisters, take a sword and kill the others. Kill the queen.

Loki felt sick.

_Weakling._

Out of the golden corridor and into a colourful garden. Flowers and trees and hedges. More statues. A table and chairs were set up near a fountain. The sky overhead was blue and clear. Birds sang from the trees and flew overhead. Everything was fragrant and beautiful with every step. Loki had never seen anything like it.

The queen sat gracefully in one chair and gestured at the other with a smile before pouring tea into two cups.

Never anything like it, but...

_What brings my darling son out to visit his old mother?_

_You're not old, Mother. Never could you be so._

_Shameless flatterer._

_I know not what you mean._

_Of course not. Sit and visit with me, Loki._

Everything went sideways. The queen cried out.

Loki closed his eyes.

***

_How may I serve you, most glorious liege?_

_You see this trembling wretch?_

_Yes. Is this unfortunate child displeasing you?_

_He frustrates me._

_What can I do?_

_You remember your lessons, don't you Maw?_

_I do, Father._

_Teach him._

***

_All this for one weak, stupid boy?_

_He is my son._

_If you ask him, he will tell you he is mine._

_He is not yours!_

_Are you so sure?_

***

His vision swam.

He was lying on a soft surface. Someone hovered nearby. He lashed out with one hand. Missed.

_It's all right. Eir is coming. It's all right._

He rolled away.

_No, sweetling. Don't move. Stay still._

He kept rolling until he fell. Now he was lying on a rug. Rich greens and gold blending together, streaks of black woven throughout.

_What are you doing?_

_What does it looked like?_

_You're buying a rug? Now?_

_Your point, Thor?_

_We're on a dragon hunt._

_So? The dragon won't care if I have a rug._

Loki always liked this rug.

He opened his mouth and screamed.

***

_Progress, Maw?_

_Yes, my liege._

_Good. I grow weary of his screams._

_I will silence him at once._

_No need._

***

The strong smell of herbs hung in the air.

Loki blinked, body as blurry as his vision.

A soft hand was over top his.

"What's happening to me?"

"Eir says you will be fine. You must rest."

"That's not an answer."

"You are healing. I promise you will be well."

Loki watched her warily. "Where is your son?"

The queen looked on him with her sad eyes. "Away. But one day he will come home to me. Soon, I think."

For the first time since he arrived in Asgard Loki felt a shiver of fear.

***

_What do we do?_

_We die a glorious death._

_Thor -_

_Asgard! Follow me!_

***

_Who do you serve?_

_You. Father._

_Good boy._

***

Sneaking out of the rooms was easy. Suddenly.

A bookcase that moved. A passage to another set of rooms. Warm and vibrant and familiar. Stealing out the door unnoticed with an effortless spell and moving quickly through endless corridors. Left, left, down the stairs, straight, right, down the stairs, straight, more stairs, left. Ending with a bright sun overhead.

He kept moving. Not thinking. His feet knew the way.

All so familiar.

A long straight bridge. A rainbow of colours.

_Anger. Despair._

_Falling._

He kept going forward.

An immovable guardian standing watch over all. A great sword in hand. Golden eyes upon him.

"You're not supposed to be here."

"Where am I supposed to be?"

An unreadable look. A lifetime of unreadable looks.

"Not here."

"I want to leave."

"Do you?"

"I want to return home."

"Is that so?

He needed that sword to operate the Bifrost Loki realized. Or Gungnir.

_Familiar._

***

_Father, please. We'll finish him together._

_Another fool come to die._

_It will not be I who dies this day._

_We'll see._

***

He met the queen on the way back to the palace.

"Where is your son?"

"I think you know."

***

_Father, please wake. Father._

_Thor. It's time to go._

***

Odin awoke beneath a golden glow he knew all too well. Turning his head, he found Frigga at his side, as he knew she would be.

She smiled and reached for his cheek, brushing it gently. "Welcome back, my love."

"How long?" He indicted the healing field with unsteady fingers.

"Several days. Eir thought you'd wake today."

He breathed deep, somewhat surprised he was breathing at all. He remembered leading Asgardian forces to Sanctuary. Seeking out Thanos. Confronting him. He remembered being struck down. Hearing Thor...

"Thanos?"

"Dead," Frigga told him. She frowned. "Thor says you killed him. You don't remember?"

"I do." Words being spoken over him. Thor desperate plea. Seeing Thanos approach. Raising Gungnir with his remaining strength. "We won."

"Yes. Thanos and his ilk are no more."

"Good."

"Yes." She smiled. "Someone else has been waiting for you to wake."

"Oh?" He followed Frigga's gaze to the other side of the bed. His blind side. Odin blinked. "Oh."

"Hello," Loki said.

Odin found himself at sudden loss for words. "It's good to see you."

"You as well." Loki was uncertain. Looking over at Frigga before his gaze came back to Odin. "I suppose we have a lot to talk about."

"Yes," Odin said. "I suppose we do. Loki - "

Loki rose suddenly. "I should leave you to your rest. I'll go tell Thor you're awake."

"We'll talk soon," Odin promised. "Any questions you have, I will answer."

Loki nodded. "All right."

"I'm glad you came to see me."

"Me too. I'll see you later. Father."

_end._

**Author's Note:**

> This one took awhile, huh? Weirdly difficult to get back in the groove of writing this one. But it's done and this series is now finished. As to what happens next? Lots and lots and lots of therapy. For everyone. :D


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